Education & Career Trends: November 13, 2022
Curated by the Knowledge Team of ICS Career GPS
Content Credit:
- Article by Karen Nimmo, published on medium.com. Original article link.
You do you, the saying goes. It sounds good in theory, but what does it actually mean? And how do we go about it in a world that demands that we fit in, and entices us to follow the same path as everyone else?
From the time we are born, expectations are laid down. From our parents and families, from our communities and cultures, and from society.
And — mostly — we buy into them. That’s because of the need to be accepted and approved of. Social desirability is a natural human drive.
Until we start to question what’s going on. Until we start to pick holes in the walls enclosing us — even rage at them. Is this right? Is it fair? the life I want? Is this really who I am?
In the beginning, here’s how it goes:
Little kids often want to dress themselves. So you get this wonderful hotchpotch of colours, clothes and shoes flung together.
But when an adult does it, prepare for the sideways glances. Some may look at it as an ‘interesting taste’. Or ‘what’s wrong with him? Where has she escaped from?’
As soon as we notice differences between ourselves and others (in the school playground), we begin moulding ourselves to fit in.
Our clothes, our speech, our expressions, our physical appearance, our interests, our behaviour. Familiarity binds us and helps us to feel secure — validated.
That’s okay — as long as you remain happy with it. Trouble is, many don’t. They don’t want to be clones. They begin to feel restricted by the ties that bind them. Especially in a world that is in a constant state of flux.
If that is you, if you want to do your own thing, be who you are, without excuse or apology, here is a place to start.
“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
Oscar Wilde
1. Wear your own skin.
When we are trying to find our place and our people we adopt the trappings of the tribe. The clothes, the habits, the activities, the values, the behaviours. We want to look — and be — the part.
But, at some point, you will get tired of trying to keep up with all that. Take time to get to know what you truly like to wear, do, be with and believe in — then practice them. It takes time to get used to the feeling of your own skin but when you do, you’ll refuse to shed it.
2. Celebrate your inner uniqueness.
Part of the job of therapy is to help people delve into the core of who they are. That takes courage because, up close, we are all a little unique and crazy — and it needs to be not hidden, but celebrated.
True individuals are on a mission: they think beyond themselves. They truly believe their “thing” can make a huge contribution to people’s lives. And, very often, it is that little drop of madness that ensures they do.
3. Start trends, don’t follow them.
True individuals don’t follow the masses. They don’t do “10 hairstyles you should never have after 40” or “100 movies you must watch before you die”. They don’t try to “keep up” or be in the cool group. Often, they will run in the opposite direction. Mostly, they just do their thing. As well as they can. And suit up for wherever it takes them.
4. Reject boredom and follow the spark.
Boredom is simply a sign that you are not engaged with the life you have found yourself in — or even the life you have built for yourself. Chronic boredom primes you for depression, too. So don’t spend your life being sick and tired of everything. Keep seeking out things that interest and challenge you. There’s something out there that will light you up. Guaranteed.
5. Let go of the need to please.
True individuals know there is no point in trying to live someone else’s dream. Or in trying to please others. They know that not everyone will like what they do — or even like them. So they act for themselves while keeping the greater good in mind
6. Stop waiting for the stars to align.
Fear has a nasty habit of turning into inaction. We’re all a little guilty of waiting for the right time to act. But there’s no such thing as the perfect time to do anything.
You don’t have to be great at something to do it. You don’t have to have researched the lifeblood out of it. The timing doesn’t have to be perfect. You just have to be curious, So start when and where you want to and figure it out as your go.
One day, when you look back, you will see the stars did line up for you. It won’t be a perfect formation — far from it — but it will be the galaxy of your life, lived in your own, unique way.
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Have you checked out yesterday’s blog yet?
Lucrative Career Options in Advertising
(Disclaimer: The opinions expressed in the article mentioned above are those of the author(s). They do not purport to reflect the opinions or views of ICS Career GPS or its staff.)
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